When your partner gives the silent treatment

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punchng.com
Mar 15, 2018 6:35 PM
Being on the receiving end when your partner uses the silent treatment method can be painful and frustrating; especially when they ignore and treat you as if you don’t exist. Here are some tips to help you deal with it
Find out why your partner is using the silent treatment method
Sometimes, people may feel that they are no match for their partner verbally, so this makes them shut down. Your partner may find it difficult to express his or her feelings because they think there are no words to express the way they feel. So, they use the silent treatment to protect themselves. The silent treatment is a form of bullying, and it’s often used to get what one partner wants in the relationship.
Don’t let it get to you
One way to cope with silent treatment is to act like it doesn’t affect you even when it does. Though it is not easy to pretend that your partner’s behaviour doesn’t affect you, it is a quick way to make your partner stop. Remember that people, who give the silent treatment, are looking for ways to get a particular reaction from you. If you refuse to play into their hands, they’ll know better than to try to get you into the game next time.
Don’t argue; talk kindly but be direct
At some point, you will have to confront your partner even if they don’t want to be confronted. Start off with a positive and factual statement. Only offer feedbacks when necessary. Let him or her know how you feel when they give the silent treatment and how it affects your relationship.  Be specific about the things they do that hurt you, so your partner sees how serious it is. If you are satisfied at your partner’s response, make an offer to reconcile and see where that takes your relationship.
Discover ways to resolve the issue
Your partner may want you to take the first move towards reconciliation because they feel that you hurt them. After giving your partner some time to cool down, try talking to them and apologise if needed. It may not seem fair, but remember that your partner is at his or her low moment and needs you to understand him or her.
Take a stand
If your relationship has gone sour because of the ongoing silent treatment method, then it is time to end it. Let your partner know that they can’t continue to give you the silent treatment. They might not like the statement but it will make them see that you are no longer going to permit that.
Don’t neglect yourself
When someone gives you the silent treatment, it’s easy to get thrown off-balance because you feel it is your fault. The moment you start feeling this way, you start losing yourself. Always remember that it is not your responsibility to teach your partner how to deal with issues. If they want to change offer your help but if they don’t, then let them be. Do what makes you happy and surround yourself with positive people. Always remind yourself that you are not a terrible person for having a partner who gives you the silent treatment.
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