When should a man stop pursuing a woman?

quora.com

Mar 11, 2018 9:00 AM

Lara l Lord

I am one.

10w ago

Ugh, this rom-com fictional crap again. Yeah, I blame the romantic comedies media is flooded with for such crap.

Women are not prey, they are not prizes, they are PEOPLE. Which means that if they in any way indicate a lack of interest it should be respected.

SO you should stop pursuing women in general and change your tactics.

You should learn to approach them like human beings, not targets or prey.

And if this is about one particular woman, the second she verbally or non-verbally indicates she is not interested in you, STOP! Don’t become that person she warns others to avoid.

Women are not obligated to return interest. Women can make up their own mind. Women can decide who they want in their personal life. If a woman has indicated she doesn’t want you, respect that and move on. It is healthier for both of you.

Christian Fann

Come on, spill it!

8w ago

The sooner the better.

Women can sometimes be confusing and shallow, I realize this, and I don’t like this. All I am saying is that what is “charming” coming from one guy is totally “unwarranted” coming from another. Even if both guys are exceuting in the exact same manner.

Whether you like it or not, this is her right.

If a woman has said that she has no interest in you, and will never have an interest in you, you should quit while you have your pride andmahood still intact.

The movies do glorify men on white horses coming in and giving chase to women. And there are a lot of women out there who imagine being rescused from their lives of peril by a handsome, self-assured and strapping man.

But women, most women, do not want to be chased after by men. Because after the chase ends, what’s next? The snack. Is that what women are to men, lunches? No, sir, they are not. You do not want to earn the reputation of being “that guy.” You know which one I’m talking about. The one who believes all women should be available to him whenever and wherever he wants.

Just cooly accept that a woman who has turned you down is doing so because she isn’t interested. You don’t need to figure out the details and the reasons behind why. Just move on to the next lady. They outnumber us, guys, so you shouldn’t have a problem finding one.

Sarah Lynn Johnson

Dated several people before I found my husband.

61w ago

You should stop pursuing a girl when she asks you to. By ignoring her request, you are demonstrating that you do not care about what she wants, nor do you respect her opinion.

You say that you heard that you should be there to support a girl, even when you two are not together. It is true that you should support the people you care about. However, supporting someone, and pursuing them after they’ve asked you to leave them alone, are two completely different things.

You should support her by respecting her decision. You should support her by listening to what she’s asked for and following through with that. If she ever comes back and asks you for help with something specific, you can support her by helping her with that specific request. However, supporting her has nothing to do with forcing your presence on her.

Right now you are not supporting her. You are bothering her. The more you continue this behavior, the more she will dislike you. It seems like she’s been asking you to stop for a long time now. At this point you are just harassing her. Please stop. You should have stopped contacting her when she asked you to.

Glenn Rocess

Was raised as a racist conservative in MS. Now I am a strong and free liberal.

61w ago

No means no. Respect her decision. You can’t force someone to love you - only heartbreak comes from trying to force someone to love you.

There’s an old saying: “If you love something, let it go…and if it comes back to you, it’s yours.” That also means that if it doesn’t come back to you, it’s not meant for you.

Edwin Trench

studied Naval Mechanical Engineer (1980)

4w ago

Love is a two way street, and both protagonists have to participate. If the girl has given you absolutely no sign whatsoever she is interested in you, then he probably isn't. Guys are pretty straightforward and specifically in what regards women. If he's interested, he will go for it, all lights flashing and sashaying all the way, unless he is totally shy.

Look, I'm not trying to scare you away, but all and any of us, deserve to be reciprocated particularly when we're talking about love. Don't waste your time or risk feeling awful and losing a relationship by forcing a situation that honestly doesn't seem to exist. Forget about him, forget about finding somebody, go out with your friends, have a good time, be yourself and enjoy life. The right guy will appear and you will know exactly who it is and when it happens.

I am a pretty normal guy, kind of romantic (which is kind of a killer when you are young) and not really outgoing and the only thing I wanted was to fall in love and have a girlfriend. My Mom (Ughh!) told me to let go and forget about it, that one day it would happen when I least expected it. I even tried to fake the "I'm not interested thing", and nothing. This until one day I really disconnected, started partying, discovered I was a hell of a good dancer and all of a sudden I had a ton of friends (boys and girls) and started to have a whale of a time. So much that I said to myself, the heck with a girlfriend, I'm having too much of a good time...and Wham! There she was (PD: I married her and am still married 40 years later).

Julia Yeckley

studied at Patuxent High School

10w ago

When she says stop. Its not a mystery. She typically will let you know that she doesn't like you and you should leave her alone. And there are more “subtle” hints. I guess. Ones that can be just as telling important of hey! Leave me alone. Would be she doesn't respond to any communication of yours anymore. Text, phone calls, email. She visibly doesn't like you around her or touching her or being around her. So there are pretty clear indications of when she doesn't like you, and when to give up. Consent is not a hard concept. But somehow escapes too many.

Michelle Lin

studied at Valencia High School

61w ago

Now is a good time.

But as most relationship breakups go, it is hard to let go and relive your life as single. Your girl has given you a big sign that she is no longer interested in a relationship with you. As a man you can either respect her decision or live your life with a broken heart.

I’m sure there are many women out there that will appreciate your kind efforts in a relationship. A lot of women these days are trying to find guys like you, because guys like you aren’t very common anymore. When you are of an uncommon rarity, your woman will be one too. Who you are now, will affect who you attract in the future. Your woman will be similar to you…like a your reflection in a mirror. You’ll find her, just be patient and let yourself heal first.

Goodluck!

Your own view over this question is also welcome...